stef_tm: Stef looking to her right suspiciously (Default)
[personal profile] stef_tm

Yesterday I hiked from the fog to an area if sun. This morning I drove from the sunny South Bay to a wall of fog on the Peninsula.

The sun is finally breaking through as I wait for lunch. Sitting in the window to get a bit of radiant heat and mood enhancing photons.

Traffic was very heavy - had to take a known congested route due to an early morning doctor's visit. Turned on the radio and watched the world around me. People frowning on the way to work, the haze from car exhausts mixing with the wispy fog as I drove north.

The metaphor of moving from clear to indistinct seems timely. Post Mrs. E's passing it feels like we now have space to think of what is next. AM is thinking long and hard about career (which took a back seat during her mother's long illness.)

My work is interesting though the bureaucracy is tremendous - easily the bulk of my time. I feel the call of greener pastures but that is habit energy more than anything else. An inner voice tells me to shelter in place an direct my efforts to health. Another voice whispers "practice" and there is the chorus of projects singing for priority in my brain - a plasma textbook, developing a hiking app, a consulting gig.

Seems like busy work. What to do with these days, these hours, these years, one lifetime?

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.

Edited to add: Here's a photo of the commute (in sunshine) 85 to 101 ramp, Mountain View

Date: 2012-12-06 12:35 pm (UTC)
ext_8703: Wing, Eye, Heart (Default)
From: [identity profile]
"What to do with these days, these hours, these years, one lifetime?"

Powerful question. It is pressing on me more and more. I miss the certainty i used to have that i was at the right place, learning the right things.

Your sambuca story is an interesting complement to this one: sheltering in place at this company seems to still present an avenue of advancement for you.


stef_tm: Stef looking to her right suspiciously (Default)

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